Self-Worth Found In Christ

Hi, I'm Megan! For those who don't know me, I grew up in a Christian home. I gave my life to Jesus at age 7 at a Christian camp called Kids Rock Camp. I love worshipping Jesus! But as I got older, there were seasons in my life when the enemy would lie and destroy my sense of identity. 

From the time I was in middle school, I struggled with body image and had difficulty making friends because I was different from everyone else, due to having a learning disability. Growing up, I was very outgoing and a fun kid, but I was classified as the "bigger girl" by my peers. During grade six, one of my friends turned her back on me, and I started to get bullied severely through name-calling. She began calling me fat and ugly, also making fun of the outfits that I wore. The bullying then progressed physically, by the same individual who tried to move me out of a seat, all because it was "their spot." This made me feel lonely and sad. I would feel unsafe attending school due to the constant bullying I was faced with. But it only got worse.. On top of verbal and physical bullying, cyberbullying came into the mix by uttering personal threats. No one understood how I felt as a middle-aged girl. There were times I felt like an old teddy bear on the shelf that no one would pick out. 

As I was going into seventh grade, I had to attend a different school, which was tough for me. I felt God was farther away than ever before. I would compare myself to others, I wanted to be "skinny," and I began believing what my enemies would say to me. It would run through my mind every single day. I became angry at God that all of this happened, and I couldn't see anything but sadness. I tried to put on a happy face, but felt sad all the time. Arguments with my mom kept occurring due to me not wanting to attend school because of the bullying. I started attending a youth group at my local church, which made me feel better, but there were times when I still felt alone. I then met a friend with whom I talked about the issues I faced, and I started to feel less alone. My friend prayed with me by ensuring that everything would be okay if I continued to trust in Jesus. I started to surround myself with faith-based people, and God provided for me. I felt better as I removed myself from negative situations. I prayed and God provided, but the more I learned about God, the more He provided. 

Our Church had hosted an event called Beautiful Unique Girl (BU Girl), which challenges teenage girls to look beyond the magazine covers and media frenzy to measure their value. Everything they talked about I related to. We were asked to write down something we were struggling with, and they would take it back and pray for us. As time went on, positive things happened on my path, and I understood that it was God. I was now in God's plan, not Satan's or my own. I understood that my low self-esteem and the things people did/said to me were acts of others, not of God Himself. He made me perfect as I am in His perfect way. 

I would like to encourage you by saying that if God made us so perfectly complex, we should accept ourselves. The Holy Spirit in our hearts can help us grow stronger and to love others. Just how I felt like an old teddy bear on a shelf that no one would pick, but remember, Jesus will always pick you! 

I do still have struggles with self-image, but I always remind myself that Jesus made me perfect just the way I am. Jesus will forgive you as He forgives me. Jesus has a beautiful plan for both you and me. Sometimes our walk of faith isn't easy, but God always knows your heart and is always walking by your side. One of my favourite verses is Psalm 139:14, "I will praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well". 

God showed me how much He loves me, even in the midst of the storm, while I was facing humiliation, He reminded me that I am valuable to God. Now today I can live knowing that I have comfort and hope in Jesus, and know that you are not an accident or mistake, you are unconditionally loved by God!

Pray Over Your Story🤍

Dear God,

Thank you so much for being there even when I'm in darkness. I'm struggling with feeling good about myself because of what the world defines as beautiful, having clothes, and the way I look. Help me to spend less time comparing others or in areas where the things of this world make me feel less than. Help me grow in my relationship with you so that I can know you made me perfect, and your opinion is all that matters. 

God bless you!

-Megan